'Minister' Jamie and his utopian enterprise

Last Tuesday, and after much build-up and anticipation (I'd been crossing the days on the calendar like a prisoner), Mr Pukka Chef Extraordinnaire, Jamie Oliver, came back into our screens with his new 'revolutionary' idea, Jamie's Ministry of Food, whereby, he thought, a domino effect could be ignited in one town by teaching 8 people how to cook 10 simple recipes so that each of them would in turn teach two more and so on and so forth in order to ultimately achieve the 'delusional' goal of turning Rotherham (one of the most characteristically deprived British towns) into a foodie stronghold. Yes, you've guessed it...It was a recipe but for disaster! The concept should be very simple and relatively easy to implement, you would think...Well, think again! These people's complete and utter disregard for real food, their lack of knowledge and interest in their nourishment and their complete addiction to convenience and quick-fix artificial takeaways was, even for Jamie, quite shocking (and he is one of the most vocal critics of this country's food culture so he should be pretty much unshockable at this stage!).

He started out with Julie, the infamous lady who 'campaigned' against Jamie's school dinners by pushing burgers and chips through the railings at her son's school. Need I say more? As most of her fellow Brits, her idea of a good home-cooked meal was fatty meat and potatoes slathered in gravy. Oh Dear...But the irony was that, compared to his other 'Guinea pigs' Julie could be described as Cordon Bleu! The most heart wrenching story of them all was a young mum of 2 who had never, ever cooked a meal for her kids and survived on greasy takeaways that they would eat sitting on the floor with their bare hands. However, she defied the stereotype because from the outset and as soon as she laid her hands on real ingredients and got to grips with Jamie's foolproof recipe for spaghetti and meatballs, she showed such passion and determination to change her ways. Jamie couldn't hide his enthusiasm at what he considered a real 'breakthrough' a sort of Cinderella-like transformation. However, the TV crew left, the clock struck midnight and, true to Julie's prophecy, nobody could be bothered anymore (Cue Marcus Brigstocke's Corduroy Planet re British builders: Couldn't lift it, couldn't even fix it...we were getting nowhere...so we had a cup of tea! See: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RSZdb2buU_c) and were back on the crisps, kebabs and other similar pathetic excuses for filling the gap as quickly and cheaply as possible.

The Guardian focused on the underlying social commentary that Jamie unwittingly provided when faced with 'poverty' as the sole explanation for people's lack of interest in food. I beg to disagree. As Jamie himself pointed out, if it was simply down to deprivation , how can it be explained that the people in Soweto or in many other parts of Africa and the world, for that matter, eat remarkably better than the Brits? And needless to say, those people do not get Council housing or benefits or own flat-screen TVs! It's about the complete and utter distance that exists in this country between most people and real food in its natural form. It is the culture of convenience, confusing modernity and progress with artiificially 'enhanced' foods presented in shiny, attractive packaging to deviate from the fact that it is as far from real as it is possible to be. But at those prices and with the ever-tempting offer of minimal or no effort at all, who cares? Well, I do and luckily many others do as well but old habits die hard and no government guidelines are going to change people's mentalities overnight. The only alternative is for the new generations to replace the old, to rediscover a relationship with food as essential to wellbeing, happiness and health and to regard food preparation as a a joy and a necessity, much like having a shower and getting dressed but also as an everyday pleasure. And to realise that good, nutritious, healthy food does not have to take ages to make or cost an arm and a leg. Look at the Italians! They simply would never compromise on food! Feeding your kids rubbish in this age of information where everything carries nutritional data and where it is nearly impossible not to know what good food is, is an act of utter contempt. And how can people blame it on poverty when the money they spend on takeaways and chocolates is far higher than they could in a few fresh ingredients from which they could make healthy meals for their family for a whole week? It's time to stop making excuses and face the grim truth...Sod Cameron and Gordon Brown. I say: Jamie for PM and let the food revolution in Britain begin once and for all!